Once you possess a post-op pouch and you’re actually able to eat some solid foods you will, eventually, Slime Yourself.
Like a Slug. But grosser. And out of a different end.
Tonight I ate a piece of reheated thin-crust pizza and a small square of dark chocolate topped with sea salt. It was delicious!
Unfortunately, my pouch did not like it. Maybe I ate too fast. Maybe I swallowed too soon and should’ve taken longer to chew up my tasty treasures. Maybe I should’ve just had a piece of cheese. No matter the case I found myself vomiting with such force my toes curled.
Pizza and chocolate together and some slime to make things just a little more disgusting.
No one is exactly sure what causes the “slime effect” but everyone I know who has had a GI procedure has been on the puking side of a slime ball. It’s stringy. It’s gross. And it’s worse than the actual regurgitated food that just rocketed from your face.
But – I have a secret tool that cuts through the slime.
Water makes it stronger.
Spitting makes it worse.
And wiling your tongue with toilet paper just tastes gross.
So- as soon as you can stop tossing your cookies or dry heaving – RUN to the sink and poor a small cup of Listerine. The hard stuff. The one that has more alcohol than a Zima. Swish. Swish. Gargle. Spit.
Repeat as needed to cut the slime.
It’s like Ghostbusters in a bottle!
You’re welcome. π